Happy Birthday, Hibari Kyoya
by Kajune
Summary: It has been ten years since Mukuro's death and Hibari still can't figure out why he keeps visiting the place they first met. 6918 TYL!1869 One-sided D18


**Title** : Happy Birthday, Hibari Kyoya

**Disclaimer **: I do not own any of the Characters including KHR.

**Genre **: Romance / Hurt / Comfort

**Warning **: Contains maleXmale content. Character Death. OOCness.

**Summary** : It has been ten years since Mukuro's death and Hibari still can't figure out why he keeps visiting the place they first met. 6918 TYL!1869 One-sided D18

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><p>I still remember.<p>

Even now I still remember that faithful day when someone died.

A brave but foolish person stood proudly before me and a bunch of herbivores.

Smiling oh-so joyfully, he told us to always take good steps towards our future.

For a while we couldn't understand the meaning behind those words.

Using his illusions he did something very disturbing and unforgivable.

He created a bright-red alarm clock that began ringing loudly from behind us.

Foolishly we all turned round to look at it the moment its sound reached our ears.

Soon after did we realize that it was meant to be a distraction.

We found that out when we turned back round and saw no one.

Not a single trace.

Less than an hour later, the whole of the Vendicare prison was said have been blown up.

All of it, with no survivors or answers as to how or why that happened.

Even after ten whole years no clues were found or were there any suspicions.

To be expected, the Vendicare prison was rebuilt with stronger security.

However, their existence meant nothing to us because what that explosion took from us was...that man.

_Rokudo Mukuro._

The sole being known to be aware of the incoming danger, who refused to tell.

Bearing that smile he welcomed his death and bid us farewell.

Even now I still remember, how angry I was that day.

I have never beaten up as many people as I did that day.

I have never cursed anyone as much as I did that day.

I have never regretted anything as much as I did that day.

That day, I was a different person filled with hate.

Blood soaked my body from head to toe, bottom lip bleeding after biting it for so long.

That day I experienced a life more extreme than ever.

That day, everyone cried until they fell asleep.

He was a man of deception, but even his lies couldn't escape death.

There was no way out and all he could do was pretend.

Smile until the flame of his life blew out, never to come back again.

Never.

* * *

><p><em>Ten years, seven months and twenty-two days ago.<em>

Those sweet lips pressed down onto the pair below again, rubbing gently before penetrating it with a saliva-soaked tongue. For the first time the two have become connected with someone, though never will they become connected by heart with anyone. Love just wasn't in the air and it in itself means nothing to them. Pain equals pleasure which is why power, battles and dominance are all they can refer to as something they love. Still, despite this being a session of rape inflicted on a brutally beaten-up teenager, neither wanted to break apart. A battle was a battle, it brings them intense joy. If it is a battle for dominance, then more joy is coming their way.

He couldn't say it to anyone that he's doing this out of love for the other, if that truly was his purpose he wouldn't of cracked so many bones without mercy. There was just something binding them, like a little string that's unbreakable, unnoticeable, and hateful. Being a criminal he must know how to kill without a second thought. Maybe the urge to pout for doing something regretful comes every now and then, but never should a criminal fall head-over-heels to a middle-schooler without knowing why.

Their bodies are connected with their clothes discarded. It couldn't be love, it just couldn't. Love brings them nothing so they will have nothing to do with it. This teenager he roughly assaults inside the torn down room, is a mere tool to be thrown away when not wanted. Yet, he can't bear with doing that. Just one look his body urged him to rape this person, and to his surprise the other eventually allowed this to go on while fighting back with the same moves.

Everything tasted sour, against his liking. That on its own was still not enough to break them up. He's not going to be able to break free from this passionate moment so easily. Until he can win the battle within himself that is between pride and pain, he will scar this person over and over.

That face he so adores, must be removed or he will go insane.

Was it, the red string of fate that was holding him down, so close to this piece of perfection?

Even Hibari can't find the answer from within.

All they can say to themselves is this isn't love, but a quick act for pleasure.

* * *

><p><em>Ten years, two months, and five days ago.<em>

It was a strange thing to occur but he knew that there was a perfect explanation for it, and that. The lousy blonde with a tendency to never be alone and bug him whenever he feels, in the name of being his tutor, unofficially asked him out on a date.

If only he knew what he was agreeing to before his answer came out so bluntly.

Yes, a proud face was what he got as a response while the subordinates showed a face of utter horror. He only knew the truth behind the invitation when a witness, Kusakabe, explained it to him with well-used words followed by a promise not to tell anyone.

Refusing to go by his word, Hibari remained in his office on the day of the special occasion and was not surprised to be questioned not long afterwards. Though he was surprised to learn that the Mafia boss later decided to hang around with him at the school as part of the date, despite having yet to confess about lying by saying it was a trip to find some tough opponents.

Time went by peacefully with not much to do for the blonde except lie on the sofa all depressed, unlike Hibari who quietly sat at his desk doing his daily paperwork. Everything was going the exact opposite as Dino had in mind for a perfect date with his student, much to his dismay.

What got on Hibari's nerves during this time wasn't how persistent Dino was, but the owl that was sitting upon a branch of the tree behind the office, its eyes gazing through the window. It looked familiar to the one always by the Kokuyo girl's side, however this one had the same eyes as _him_. It was spying on them patiently, only to flap its wings rather quickly whenever the intruder made a sudden movement.

Remembering what _he_ was capable of, the reason for the owl's appearance was clear. However, its purpose for being there was unknown. For hours Hibari tried to figure out the answer to thispuzzling question but to no avail. In the end Dino decided to leave in a rather bad mood, unaware that his face was covered with blood that popped out of nowhere. Somehow, that blood didn't look so real and it was then that Hibari realized that _that person_ was responsible.

When he turned round to look accusingly at the owl he saw nothing but a lonely tree branch.

It was as if Mukuro was guarding him from trouble before pulling a childish prank on the weakling, who wasn't any threat to begin with.

Still, why would he do such a thing for his rival?

The answer is a mystery.

* * *

><p><em>Ten years and forty minutes ago.<em>

Within one of the town's shopping districts, a group of allies walked along the long-long path with the same destination. Just as things seemed to be going normally, meaning without the use of explosives and such, a teenager popped out of nowhere before the group and surprised them, literally knocking them off their feet and down to the ground. A joyful smile appeared before them all, blocking their views from the truth behind this encounter.

Questionable looks, angry looks and happy looks were on their faces. Two or maybe three called the other's name, but they were ignored. If only they knew what was being hidden from them so perfectly, their reactions would of been the same. However by knowing this truth even at that time, things weren't going to change. Fate had made an ultimate decision and nothing in the world has the ability to undo what shall happen.

"Always take good steps towards your future, Vongolas."

The happy-looking illusionist said to those before him, with a tone that lacked even the tinniest hint of bad intents. It was pure and it carried the meaning of being encouraging, but sometimes it can feel like a painful joke, spoken out all because a liar couldn't die happy without lying in some manner.

Tall and proudly he stood under the sun's light, visibly unaffected by the great loss he shall experience soon. All of those he knows well felt confused, unable to make any sense out of those words. Those final, unforgettable yet loving words.

Approximately forty minutes later did the truth become as clear as the vast sky above them, with no way of avoiding it as it is reality, and now a part of their memories. A sudden explosion that greatly exceeded all in the history of the Mafia world, reached the ears of everyone involved to some extent. The sun Arcobaleno was the first to learn, painfully did he spread the news to the future Vongola members.

Everything was gone with no remains or any given reason for the cause of it.

Nothing was left.

All of it...was wiped out instantly.

* * *

><p><em>Present<em>

Kokuyo Land has long been abandoned by its owners, leaving it as a junkyard or what the former members call it as 'Mukuro's final resting place'. Even if he died somewhere far away from here, they still respected this place as his home and where his soul shall be able to visit. A couple of years ago flowers were placed right around the building, since everyone had accepted its new status despite the lack of real care it has been getting. No one comes to clean it from the inside or out, turning it into a house for bugs such as spiders and many others.

It is known as a sacred place which now only Hibari visits once every three months. The pain may still burden their souls but knowing that they have to move on, everyone turned their backs on their memories and never returned to this place. As much as Hibari wanted to do the same and as much as everyone is convinced as how unmoved Hibari is by the situation, he can't. Things about the dead one still bother him so much that he can't just turn away even if it means beating himself up in hopes of forcing his mind into the right direction.

He wants to forget and finally grow up.

Sadly the memories are too real and that smile is still as dazzling as it was on the day he first saw it. He seems to find it very hard to forget anything that went on between the two of them, as if he was going to accept that anything big actually happened.

Heading to the room where they first met, fought and had sex in, Hibari expects to only see its deteriorated condition, but what he was met with was _those eyes_. Just like that very day years ago, Mukuro sat upon that damaged sofa with a mischievous face while watching him as he entered the room, neither unafraid of anything. Even now he is there, looking up at him with that same look, same posture, same _smile_.

This isn't his imagination, nor is it the trick of the light. Something is sitting there and it is looking directly at him. The atmosphere feels refreshing like it did back then and the only thing that is different is himself. The room's condition seems to have returned to the way it was before, all that is missing are the cherry blossoms.

"Mukuro." Hibari whispers, aware that he is loud enough for the other to hear.

No response is given, just a pair of blinking eyes looking at him...proudly.

"You're a fool." He finally states, even though after all this time this wasn't what he wanted to say. He just can't bring himself to find the right words and say what has been bugging him for years. Why did he come here again? Why does he still remember that day? Why does he constantly think about Mukuro? Why did he allow himself to be raped? Why? Questions crowding his thoughts endlessly, and each day it often feels like there's a new mystery to solve.

The answer is somewhere in his heart. Deep down in that area the answer lies clear just like the sun that shines onto this building. That moment of being violated was given a reason and that was to gain pain mixed with enormous amounts of pleasure. He has accepted that reason, yet he can't seem to shake off the feeling of being unsure. Why?

_Silence._

Mukuro doesn't say a word, as if dying has made him mute. It doesn't matter though, as long as he listens. "You're..." Hibari still can't say it. "...a fool for dying." He's not, he's just a fool for lying. Death is the one thing no one can avoid, but he didn't have to lie to cover it up like a real fool. "You are a complete fool." Aside form stating out obvious lies, Hibari's voice begins to shake a little. What is wrong with him?

Slowly drifting down before his eyes is a pink petal, provoking him to look up and see what has been missing from this room. "Mukuro." Hibari whispers again, but almost lovingly. When he looks back down he no longer sees that figure on the sofa, instead he sees two other figures on the floor having the time of their lives. Right there he can see the moment that was never discovered, mentioned or cared for. It was as if they had fallen into a deep dream and became connected through their minds, thus producing this illusion.

He did enjoy himself, but at the same time he hated it all.

Did he?

Suddenly, the sound of the alarm clock rings in his ears, and he turns round to spot it. That clock, that demon-like clock that tore him away from Mukuro. If he hadn't fallen for its trap, he would of seen Mukuro a bit longer. It was clear that the other wanted to leave like a magician, which is why he wouldn't of wanted Hibari to not look in the wrong direction. To appear out of nowhere and do the same when disappearing. Leaving no trace, but a memory of himself. It was simply his style of lying.

Before his eyes wasn't the greatly hated clock, but it was Mukuro, standing proudly the exact same way he did that day. That clear smile was once again right in front of him. Instead of looking down, he was looking up at him.

Hibari is aware that the scene from behind is gone because he can no longer hear any moans. Those very sounds once thought to be rather addictive. "Fool." Hibari says again, only to feel unhappy with doing so. He _still_ can't figure out the much-wanted answer. What was it that really happened between them that time?

"Go away, fool." He says with a cracking up voice. It seems hard to understand what is going on at the moment. His chest is hurting so badly upon seeing this man standing before him as if he was alive. It was ten years ago since they last met, so how can be really be there? How! There is no reason for him to feel pain. Mukuro had lied and left him in a terrible state on that very day. Even if he was alive or dead, he shouldn't be forgiven.

"Fool!" He yells again, only to release a few tear drops unwillingly. Mukuro's smile grows wider a bit. Is it because just now he seemed funny? Or maybe pitiful? Whipping away the tears in his eyes, Hibari glares down at the other. Just then it hits him, that same feeling he had when he heard of Mukuro's death. Now that he remembers, he finally realizes that he didn't just get angry and simply shrug the news off while carrying clear memories of how he learned of it. The truth was...on the night of that day he went home and cried in agony for a surprisingly long time.

He cried on the day Mukuro died.

Out of all people _he_ cried over Mukuro's failure to live on.

Right now he is repeating that moment, crying over something so unimportant but he is indeed unable to hold off the tears that flow from his eyes. This isn't like him. All they did was form a rivalry and their sexual moment means absolutely nothing. Isn't that...the truth?

The memory of his previous tears are so clear now. He did cry, as if he had lost something dear to him. Something he cared for. Something...he loved.

Love.

It has never meant anything to him or Mukuro, but does that mean it can't exist or it can?

Is this love?

The feeling of mixed hate and sadness caused by the removal of someone special. Is this the work of love?

How can he fall in love with another man?

Doing so is completely outrageous and worth giving a beating for but, what else could explain his tears and constant thoughts on the deceased?

What else was left to make all of this into perfect sense?

Before he knew it, he had Mukuro against the wall with their lips in a tight lock.

Despite realizing his own actions against the one feeling awfully warm to the point of feeling very frightening, Hibari doesn't push away but forces his tongue inside. He is filled with happiness when he feels the tongue of the other respond.

'Mukuro.' He says in his mind.

The other hasn't spoken to him yet, and even though his words are very-often coated in lies he still wants to hear them. That beautiful voice with such a sweet tone to it. He likes it so much that he can't deny it any longer. No one can copy the sound of that voice, even with years having gone by the memories are still clear and no one can succeed in pretending to be this person. No one.

The kiss goes on for a long while, only to end when the need for air comes. Both breath deeply, but before they have fully recovered Hibari resumes it. He can't get enough of this sensation, not then or now. He wants to taste those lips forever, despite the mysteries going on as to who in the world is standing before him.

Mukuro is dead, yet he is right here.

Did he really die?

Did he?

Wanting to know so badly and so _eagerly_ Hibari breaks the kiss. "Are you dead? Mukuro." He asks, only to earn a faint smile. Those eyes show a hint of sadness, but not enough to satisfy Hibari who greatly wants a direct answer. His temper grows and as a response he grabs hold of Mukuro's shoulders with both hands and bangs him against the wall just once. That expression still remains the same. Oh how he hates it for existing. "Answer me!" He demands, only to see more of a proud look than a minute ago

Why won't he say anything?

Hurt right down to the core, Hibari's hands pull down Mukuro's jacket. In only a short amount of time does he strip Mukuro naked and have him on the floor, with their bodies connected once more. This doesn't turn out to be a battle for passion when Mukuro isn't willing to fight back and be on the top. After a few deep thrusts at long last Mukuro lets out the sounds of his voice in moans. Hibari must admit that they sound rather sexy.

However, he can't understand why the other is still here and unaffected by anything at all that is happening. His appearance hasn't changed one bit unlike himself who has grown to be an adult.

Hibari can't tell if the other is still smiling since his body is getting violated from behind. Why he chose to take this position is unclear just as much as his reason for coming here so often. "Hibari Kyoya!" Just as one reaches their limit, Mukuro finally cries some words. "I love you!" Words his partner never expected hear.

Time stops and so does Hibari's movements.

A sudden confession puts Hibari into a state of shock, unable to respond or move even an inch.

Truthfully, Mukuro _is _shocked by the sudden turn of events and after going through a moment of pain and pleasure in a whole new way, his mask falls apart and he too starts to shed tears. Hibari always thought that only he was seeking the answer to his constant thinking about Mukuro. In reality, Mukuro too couldn't rest without finding out why he said those final words in the first place, while giving Hibari the final look before fading away.

Was it...truly love?

Was that red string of fate really there at that time when they made love?

Was it?

A broken-down soul finally realizes the answer and fails to keep quiet about it. Which is why he cries outwhat he has learned into the ears of his beloved. The one person he had so much interest in that the word 'toy' or 'tool' felt very wrong for him. Ever since both were teenagers they had been in love and because they have never seen anything in such a form, ten years have been wasted trying to search for the answer while fighting off feelings of jealousy and hate, and also sadness.

"I...love...you." Mukuro sobs, making it clear to Hibari that he is crying.

Wanting to see those tears for himself, Hibari effortly breaks from his frozen state and - after pulling out - reaches down for Mukuro. Just as he turns him round to see his face, Mukuro shows off his smile again. Sadly, even though the mask is always without flaws that face is still wet along with the floor he was facing down at. Tears are also still pouring out from his eyes, but Mukuro doesn't hold back and puts on his best act once again. All Hibari can do is go down and kiss him again.

His heart begins to beat fast, making it harder to think straight. He has a chance to say it. He must say it. He wants to say it.

_I love you._

Both their tears end up merging with each other, since Hibari's own reappears and starts dripping down along the side of Mukuro's face. Both are crying, one with the face of a sad man while the other shows the face of a proud teenager. He is proud that Hibari is still alive and well, which means that he has taken the right path in life like everyone else.

Just as he wanted.

_I love you._

Three words and all will be over. Their hearts will forever be connected and all the lies will be washed out of his life. It was so simple, so true, and so strongly desired to be said and heard.

"I..." Hibari mutters painfully.

He can't dare to rip away his own pride, it just isn't right. Mukuro may have done the same by confessing with a slightly hurt expression, but Hibari hasn't given up on himself and he shouldn't for anything. Ten years have gone by with a tough appearance that shows no weakness or any signs of regret. All that effort put into acting he simply can't bear to throw it away.

Though he really wants to say it anyway.

"...Hate you."

Lies.

Before he kept telling himself that every illusionist was a liar, but actually the real liar was himself. Viewing his own desires so highly that he throws everyone aside, granting them a long-lasting effect. A liar never cares how others feel, it is always about themselves. It takes Hibari until now to understand what kind of person he truly is.

Mukuro's face briefly shows unhappiness, before returning to that hateful look. Hibari, tired of seeing it no matter what the reason for its return this time, hits Mukuro across the face. Unfortunately the other simply smiles on, ignoring those tears that come out from both of them. "I still...love you." He says, breaking Hibari's heart into pieces.

Gripping the fabric right above the area of his heart, Hibari shuts his eyes while experiencing the agony. It hurts to hear lies, but hurts more to say them. How long has it been since he created the habit of lying like this? Since when did he become the kind of person he hated so much? When his eyes open again, he finds himself standing right where he was standing before he heard the sound of the alarm. Desperately he looks back to where Mukuro was resting and sees no trace of anything.

It was as if he was dreaming, but he knows that it was all too real to be that way and things just turned out like this because he lied. If he hadn't, he knows that they would of stayed together longer. Dignity has always come first so it is truly impossible to tell the truth and go against what he has always been following. Never has he considered such a thought to be a cause of constant lying, so possibly for years has he been this way without truly knowing.

For many hours does Hibari remain inside Kokuyo Land, crying away the hate he now has for himself. He wants to accept these feelings he has discovered and admit it to Mukuro how he feels, so that he can finally break from his shell and grow up to become more mature, more truthful when need to be, and stronger in every other way besides physically.

By the time he heads for the exit the sky has already turned bright orange. His eyes are red and sore from the release of his suppressed pain. All this time he and Mukuro have been bonded together and forever have stayed in touch by heart, though not strongly enough to wash away said pain. Hibari is a weakling for giving into his own desires and not do what must have been done. He loves Mukuro, he knows it but can't come to admit it out loud, not now and never will especially without said teenager being around.

He stops walking when he arrives just outside the building, slightly hit by the sun's weak light that shines directly towards him. With sad eyes he looks back temporary. This place may look spooky and be a bit smelly, but it truly is sacred. So much that a man of his status can't abandon it.

Suddenly, a voice speaks up from the shadows of the path he just took.

"Always take good steps towards your future."

Those encouraging words are said, injuring Hibari more but strengthening him at the same time just as they should have done before. Mukuro is still here but he won't appear for a liar to see. Just knowing that he is the one responsible for his own pain, he doesn't feel as weak as before. Giving off his bravest of smiles, Hibari turns away, and is surprised to feel a hand suddenly push him forward. He turns right back only to see Mukuro standing in the distance despite having just felt his hand on him.

He looks much happier now, but Hibari wishes that he's wearing a mask, because it will mean that he still loves him.

No one wants to be in the presence of someone they don't love, right?

Smiling like that is another way of saying, 'go far away from here (or me)'.

Hibari takes a deep breath. Maybe he should take this chance and say it again before taking he final leave. He feels it from within that Mukuro doesn't want him to come back even if it means that they will be together again. Possibly because of who he has become now, with the title of not being a middle-schooler but a Mafioso. Of course Mukuro doesn't want to see any of those black-suited people, and that most-likely includes himself. Even after death he can't accept the Mafia, but at least he accepts something far more important.

_His own feelings. _

Like he said that day ten years ago, he wants Hibari to go forward for his future and live another ten crazy years, whether or not he wants to do it alone. To look back at this place is the last thing Mukuro wants him to do, despite the pain they will both share from it.

Chances like this don't come everyday, which is why he is fully aware that he needs to say it quickly. Right now he feels much stronger, given strength from his own understandings and Mukuro's sweet words. That is all that is keeping him standing there looking less of a lost lover, and this is finally the time for him to be brave.

"I like - no, love you, Mukuro." He finally manages to say, but with a very cracked up voice beyond how it was before. Tears aren't going to appear this time, but he does feel a little bit of strain on his heart for having to go through with something so 'new' and constantly rejected. After all, this marks the end of his years-long struggle.

Love fills him from within, forcibly throwing all lies and painful things aside from his injured heart. All the suffering feels like it is fading away, and the rising temper that keeps on unleashing itself drops down, thus granting Hibari the feeling of being free.

_Free_, is how he feels right now.

Long has he wanted to feel so relaxed from deep within, so much that at times he would do odd things just to feel such sensation. Never in his life could he fully accept that love was the key to solving his inner problems. Now he understands that it is and is willing to smile all day just to show how glad he feels. From a puzzled and stressed out person to a more experienced and happy one, Hibari Kyoya is back to the way he should of been for almost all his life.

"Go." Mukuro's unforgettable voice speaks up, in a tone that sounds like he was insisting the other to comply.

He wants to hear his voice more but, knowing Mukuro expects only more out of Hibari's future than their relationship, Hibari nods and smiles wider, suppressing the urge to run back and make out with him again. He regretted looking away from Mukuro that day, but today he wants to do the right thing and slowly turns away from Mukuro even if it means to once again never see him. Inhaling much deeper than before, Hibari looks at the glowing light of the setting sun and marches forward.

If he quickly looks back, he would see a red string attaching itself to him from Mukuro.

Seeing this little thing finally make its brief appearance for a permanent stay, Mukuro laughs his signature laugh. "Kufufu...Kahahaha!" He is so proud of Hibari, so so proud of him, and from now on, things will get much better from how they used to be. Maybe someday, the opposite end of Hibari's string will be reborn to fulfill their promise for a fight, and their desires for more bonding.

Letting out one final laugh, Mukuro says one final thing before vanishing.

"Happy birthday, Hibari Kyoya."

* * *

><p><strong>Owari<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note :<strong> Please send me Private Messages if you have noticed any mistakes in the story, and as the title suggests, this is written for Hibari Kyoya's birthday. Hope you enjoyed and thank you for reading.


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